This Blog has Moved!

Please note that this blog has moved. I am now located at Organique Gal. I have been working hard with the help of Rebweb Design to consolidate the blog Me and My PCOS, Me and My Obesity, my public wordpress Organique Gal blog, and my private Organique Gal blog. If you are also a subscriber to the private Organique Gal blog, be sure to login one more time to retrieve the password for the protected posts.

Be sure to subscribe to the RSS feed so you won't miss any new posts. I personally prefer google reader because it's easy to use and is linked in with my google gmail account, but I've set it so you can pick the one you're most comfortable using.

If you like a post or have something you're burning to share, I would really appreciate hearing your thoughts in the comments section.

Where did I go?

I'm in the process of consolidating and moving my 3 blogs to my own designated domain Organique Gal. It will be easier to navigate, much prettier, and a lot more focused.

Some big changes in my life are happening right now. I'm focusing on writing my first novel and getting published (that experience will be blogged about under the topic Organic Creativity) and I'm in the middle of launching my own office services business. Check out the new article that was run in the local paper (under blog in the menu) this week! Exciting times.

In addition I will continue blogging about living a more natural organic lifestyle and pursuing health and wellness and weight loss.

The new site is being pushed live today, so keep checking back... if you're like me, you'll be compulsively hitting refresh every 30 seconds until it shows up. Or maybe you have a life? Let me know what you think of my new site look and navigation. I am working on making it easy to access.

Be sure to subscribe to the new RSS feed when the site goes live so you stay updated on all the different topics I will be adding. The new site will have a lot more photos and I hope to have more readership feedback.

Thanks for reading!

Taking a 3 month break

I'm feeling really disgusted with how much time is sucked out of my real life by online activities. See you in the New Year.

I HATE BEING FAT

Yes, it's all in caps. Sue me. I'm yelling cause I'm MAD.

I don't eat any sugar, honey or maple syrup.

I don't eat any dairy.

I don't eat any meat, fish, or poultry.

I don't eat any wheat.

I don't eat any yeast.

I don't eat anything with caffeine.

I don't eat any citrus.

I don't eat anything with vinegar.

I don't eat anything with artificial sweeteners.

Everything I eat is whole and organic.

EVERYTHING. Nothing processed.

I eat tons of fresh organic veggies.

All the grains I eat are organic and whole.

I eat beans and lentils everyday.

I drink tons of water and herbal tea.

Yes, that list is true. I have been completely 100% diligent about this diet (except for one accidental drink of orange juice when I felt a cold coming on and was needing some vitamin C) for two solid months.

Yet... I have gained half a pound a week for THREE weeks running.

I'm mad.

It's not fair.

I'm throwing a full out hissy fit.

Weight Change and Weigh-ins

Aug 11: 278
Aug 18: 274.5 (-3.5)
Aug 25: 274.5 (0)
Sept 1: 272.5 (-2)
Sept 8: 270.5 (-2) Down 7 inches from waist, chest, hips and thigh
Sept 15: 268.5 (-2)
Sept 22: 269 (+0.5)
Sept 29: 269.5 (+0.5)
Oct 6: 270 (+0.5)

Total loss to date: 8 lbs

Trying to get the cravings under control...

I am trying to pinpoint why my cravings are SO out of control the last week or two. Some ideas I am throwing around are:

1. I've been prescribed 10-12 g of chlorella. I was doing 12 g a day (6g in the morning, 6g in the evening) until about a week ago, and then in hopes of saving a little money on supplements I cut back to 5g and 5g. This morning I upped the dosage to my regular to see if that makes a difference.
2. I'm on an insanely high dosage of progesterone from my fertility specialist, trying to "shock" my hormones into doing what their supposed and in the process induce menses. Seriously, it's insanely high. A friend of mine takes prog every month and takes 10mg. I'm taking 400 mg a day. Only today and tomorrow left, and then I'm NEVER taking it again.
   
3. I've been forgetting to drink my protein shakes most days. Possibly because it tastes so nasty, but I think it is most likely helping more than I want to admit.
4. I'm constantly hungry and the urge to binge is getting more intense, and instead of eating something high protein and whole grain, I've sat down with a large bowl of salted popcorn with coconut oil or a big bowl of potato chips and hummus dip. Fruit spritzers are also a "treat" I go for when I'm having intense cravings.

If I'm going to survive this healing cleanse, I am going to have to try changing these things and see if that helps. I'll keep you posted.

Fail Proof Soda Bread (egg free, sugar free & dairy free)

Adapted from a bread machine recipe I found online. I've searched and searched and can't find the link, so if you come across this recipe and it belongs to you (I know your first name), let me know so I can give credit where credit is due.

Ingredients:

3 cups flour (I use kamut, but any flour will work)
4 t baking powder
1 t salt
1.5 cups liquid (I use rice milk, but any liquid will work )
0.25 cup liquid fat (I used melted coconut oil)

1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees.
2. Mix dry ingredients.
3. Mix wet ingredients in separate bowl.
4. Add wet ingredients to dry ingredients. Stir until there is no more dry flour, but don't overwork it - it should be lumpy.
5. Oil your hands, gently shape wet dough into a ball or oval.
   
6. Place on a clean ungreased baking sheet. You can score the top of the bread, but I find it cracks naturally and is quite nice without it.
7. Bake for 30 or 40 minutes.
   

Variations:

• Oil the top of the bread and sprinkle with a savory herb like oregano or rosemary or sea salt.
• Replace liquid with juice and add finely diced dried fruit.
• Replace liquid with tomato juice and add sundried tomatoes.
• Add seeds

The End.

This morning I woke up feeling done with infertility and the quest to add to our family and just felt the need to enjoy our simple family of three.

DH and I have come to realize that infertility is not something that is going to be "resolved" in any way we are willing to go (fertility drugs or interventions), and have been discussing other options for growing our family. Adoption. Foster care.

I asked B if we could be done and just enjoy our simple life with our simple family. He agreed.

There are so many blessings to having children, and obviously we would welcome a new baby with open arms. But on the other hand, I am finding a lot more peace in having a completed family.

We have been seeking positives in having a completed family:

1. I won't be pregnant. My first pregnancy, labor and delivery were really miserable and very hard on my body. I spent 9 months in chronic pain and lived on a heating pad. I had over 100 hours labor, and no support from my xh after delivery. Pregnancy doesn't hold any charm for me.
2. There's no longer a chance of having high order multiples that could potentially ruin us financially and put a huge amount of strain on our marriage.
   
3. I'm tired of us grieving our infertility and want our family to start living and enjoying life fully again. We can just chill out, enjoy our simple little family, and stop stressing about infertility. I might even write that novel that has been brewing in my mind since I was a child.
4. No more visits to specialists. No more evil hormone supplements. No more raging hormone fluctuations. Just a basic pursuit of health for health's sake.
   
5. We are officially done with years of sleepless nights, no more constant breastfeeding for me, no more poopy diapers to change, and no more screaming teething pain.
   
6. I love having a school age independent child who is in school full days. This is my favorite phase of parenting. We have discussions on every topic under the sun. We enjoy spending time together as a family.
   
7. We have time to focus on growing our businesses and there won't be a 5-6 year gap in my employment until the new baby is old enough to be in school full days.
   
8. We don't have to worry about a huge 7+ year age gap between our kids. I am 7, 9 and 11 years older than my sisters and we have never been close, and I won't have to worry about my children being strangers to each other.
   
9. We can support our son fully in his interests like soccer and music without worrying about a baby putting it on hold.
10. We can easily travel and our son is old enough now to thoroughly enjoy the traveling lifestyle. No worries about one of us staying at the hotel for baby's nap time. We can travel as a family and enjoy sightseeing as a family.
11. In just 11 short years our son will be a high school graduate and we can pursue our dream to volunteer in a third world country.
12. As my husband joked earlier today, we are doing our part for lowering the population of the planet and in turn decreasing our carbon footprint. Definitely the LAST benefit, but still true.

Some changes to this blog are coming in the next couple weeks. The focus will be shifting from the quest to get pregnant to the quest for complete health and wellness. You're still welcome to discuss your experiences with infertility as I can't totally relate, but my focus is changing.

Blueberry Crumble Bars

Adapted from Smitten Kitchen

I was so excited to taste them I burnt my mouth. LOL TOTALLY worth it. Oh yum... oh heavenly blueberry heaven.

Without further ado... I give you...

Blueberry Crumble Bars

Ingredients:
1 cup agave nectar
1 teaspoon baking powder
3 cups kamut flour
1 cup oatmeal
1 cup cold coconut oil, cubed
1 egg
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 cube sour plum puree (or the juice and zest of 1 lemon)
4 cups fresh or frozen blueberries (if using frozen, be sure to drain them!)
1/3 cup agave nectar
4 teaspoons cornstarch

1. Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C). I didn't grease my 9×13 inch pyrex pan and it came out just fine.
2. In a medium bowl, stir together 1 cup agave nectar, 3 cups flour, and baking powder. Mix in the salt.
3. Use two butter knives or a pastry cutter to blend in the coconut oil and egg. Dough will be crumbly. Pat half of dough into the prepared pan. Sprinkle 1/2 cup of the oatmeal over the dough.
4. In another bowl, stir together the agave nectar, cornstarch and plum puree. Gently mix in the blueberries.
5. Sprinkle the blueberry mixture evenly over the crust. Crumble remaining dough over the berry layer. Sprinkle remaining oatmeal and gently pat into the dough.
6. Bake in preheated oven for 45 minutes, or until top is slightly brown.
7. Cool completely before cutting into squares. Or don't and eat hot straight out of the oven like I did. Just beware of burning your tongue. Not that you'll care cause it's SO yum!

Makes 16 large bars.

What a bunch of hooey this is

I'm so so so tired of my body kacking out on me. IT IS NOT FAIR.

For 1.5 months I've been eating only whole foods and have eliminated dairy, sugar, caffeine, soy, wheat, yeast, vinegar, and citrus out of my diet.

The first 4 weeks I noticed some great changes. I lost 10 lbs. I had better energy. My stomach wasn't hurting all the time.

The last 2 weeks have had zero changes. In fact, I regained weight. I thought maybe it was because I skipped breakfast for a few days. Saw some good results for the first two days I was eating breakfast again, then nothing. I've been gaining weight again. GAH! WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?!

I'm doing the work. I'm not seeing the results I want. Why should I continue? I hate this diet. It is the worst diet I've ever been on in my life. At least on a calorie restricted diet I can still eat the foods I love. A major binge is working itself up. It is NOT going to be pretty.

I talked to Dr. Debra about what is happening and she tells me that once I'm finished the first 3 months I can have one cheat day a week. I have no idea how I'm going to get that far?! I'm sitting here crying just thinking about the next month and a half. I can't do this.

I'm seriously considering getting weight loss surgery. At least I'd see some major results with the restrictions. I'm not cool with self-inducing restrictions with no results.

OH, and to make matters worse, I started taking low doses of progesterone to induce a period. I have 4 more days to go and in the meantime being inside my head is NOT NICE. One minute I'm feeling all sensitive and hurt, the next I'm feeling mean and irritated. I sincerely apologize to my friends and family who have been hurt by my actions and words in the last week. I'm trying SO hard to control myself but sometimes it just bursts out of me and I can't rein it back in. I'm so sorry. You don't deserve this. :(

Sorry for the negativity today but I'm just SO DONE. Hold me back. I am dreaming of a homemade baked mac and cheese casserole and eating the whole thing slathered in ketchup, and washed down with 2 litres of coca cola. Dessert is a whole lemon meringue pie. See? Told you there's a binge working itself up... :(

Progesterone makes me feel like crap

Crampy, nauseous, bloated, and uber grumpy. I think tonight would be a good night to lay on the couch in my jammies sipping herbal tea and watching TV till I can't keep my eyes open any longer.

I'm trying a new kind. This is 2 tablets inserted vaginally twice a day. The last time I took progesterone orally I was so dizzy I felt like I was going to pass out. This is supposed to be a lower dosage and easier for my body to process.

Um... okay? Not exactly. :/

Confession time...

As loathe as I am to admit it, I have a sneaking suspicion I know the cause of my recent weight gain. I've been skipping breakfast again for the last week (or a bit longer?). I wake up at my usual time, around 7:30 to 8 AM, and then end up working till 1 or 1:30 PM before I take the time to eat anything.

It's a horrible habit I've had for most of my life. It's particularly bad when I work from home cause at least when I was working for someone else I have to drive to work, which makes me pause long enough to feel hunger, so I would usually eat something before 10 AM.

I'm also taking my supplements much later in the day, which could be part of the issue too...

And on top of that, I've also been drinking less water, some days less than 2 cups full. I love tea and I usually choose that over water when I'm busy and not thinking about it too much. Tea is especially nice when the air starts to cool. BUT, I have a lovely new water bottle... just need to start USING IT.

So... I'm going to try my best to eat within an hour of waking and drink the water before I indulge in my love of tea.

Easy yummy tacos

This is a vegetarian dairy-free, egg-free, wheat-free, sugar-free, vinegar & citrus-free meal. If you don't have these diet limitations you can add organic sour cream and salsa, and even a little grated cheese. We thoroughly enjoyed this simple quick meal without them though.

Ingredients:

6 hard taco shells
1 can Amy's organic refried beans with chilies
1 diced tomato
1 avocado sliced into 6 long pieces

Instructions

1. Put the beans in a bowl and put in the microwave for 2 minutes or till hot through.
2. Heat the taco shells at 200 degrees for 4-5 minutes.
3. Assemble 6 warm taco shells with a large spoon of refried beans, a few pieces of fresh tomato, and 1 slice of avocado. Salt and pepper to taste.

Weight gain, pain, fatigue, and twitches

This just isn't my week. I've been watching my weight go up, up, up. At one point I was up 2.5 lbs. This morning I'm only up 1 lb, but STILL! I'm hoping that by my Tuesday weigh-in I'll be down 3 lbs. (HAHAHAHAHA. Excuse me while I laugh hysterically at my wit.) I honestly have no idea why I'm gaining weight. My portions haven't changed. I'm basically eating the same foods. I'm exercising, did pilates twice, and walked for hours on Thursday. It's a mystery to me. And I don't like it one bit!

The pain goes on, and on, and on. Carpel tunnel. Tendinitis. Sore back and shoulders. Fallen arches and extremely sore feet.

And then my left leg started doing these enormous full leg twitches 3 days ago that really freak me out. Seems to be related to the extreme evening fatigue that hits around 8 PM. Which brings me to another weird phenomenon. Why am I so exhausted again all of a sudden? I had great energy, I was feeling good. Now I feel like I'm in major detox mode all over again.

What the heck is going ON with me?! I thought I would be past the worst of it with this cleanse. I seem to be regressing.

Frustrated with the pain

My feet hurt a LOT. I was standing at the counter cooking for a few hours tonight, and now I can barely walk they are so tender. I have also noticed that after sitting for a while, especially if the chair is a bit high for me, my feet just kill when I stand and try and walk. I find myself limping for a few minutes and it feels like my foot is swollen and is going to burst out of the skin. Very unnerving, actually. The chiro says it's because I have a fallen arch. I've always had really great strong arches. WHY NOW?!

We did some foot exercises in pilates on Wednesday night, and I'm really hoping they strengthen my arches and help with this pain cause it's getting very old.

My left leg is twitching tonight. It's annoying and I can't figure out why it's doing that. You can STOP NOW, left leg.

My carpal tunnel is REALLY bad. Worse than it's been in a few years. I'm 99% sure it's from chopping veg cause that's the only new repetitive motion I've introduced lately. *sigh*

Stupid broken body. GAH!

Fast Food with dietary restrictions

Wow... eating out is a real challenge these days. Yesterday I had an eye appointment in town, so I decided to make the most of it and run a few errands and see the new Meryl Streep movie "Julie and Julia". Problem was that I left home around 11:30 AM and wouldn't be home till after 7 PM. I packed a couple rice cracker sunflower seed and sugar free jam sandwiches, some dried fruit, and apple and something to drink.

By 3:30 all my food was gone and I was hungry...

Uh oh...

The movie was showing at a theatre in a mall, so I went to the food court. I asked to check the ingredients at Taco Bell, and the beans and hard tacos were fine! Woohoo! I had a bean, tomato and lettuce hard taco with some water, for only $4, and it was SO satisfying... I also smuggled some "hippie chips" (bean and corn tortilla chips) into the movie theatre with some more water.

When I got home I was pretty hungry, but wasn't dealing with a headache or the grumpies, so that's something! I had a big bowl of leftover lentil stew (which was pretty darn delicious let me tell you!) with some soda bread.

Fertility Specialist Appointment

Yesterday we had a follow up appointment with our specialist to go over the results of my husband's post surgery semen analysis. If you recall he had an out patient embolization procedure a few months ago to resolve an issue with one of his testes varicose veins.

No change. Not what we wanted to hear.

We asked if there was anything dh could take to help and we came home with $150 worth of vitamin supplements.

He also followed up with me. I am still not ovulating. I've only had three periods in 2009 and all three were progesterone induced. He sent me to get my progesterone levels tested and tested for pregnancy. Once I have those results he's recommending that I do another round of progesterone and then start taking clomephine to induce ovulation.

Here's the catch. Multiple births. I shudder every time I hear those two words. I'm at particularly high risk for multiple births because of the PCOS. I have dozens of eggs ready to be released, and there's a very high likelihood that if I were to get pregnant, I would have a high order multiple birth.

My first pregnancy and delivery were pretty rough. I lived on a heating pad my entire pregnancy and had difficulty doing anything because my SI joint in my hip was so inflamed the entire 9 months. Labour was a nightmare. I was abandoned by my xh when I was 3 months pregnant, and had a VERY stressful pregnancy. I had a homebirth that was over 100 hours long. By the end of it I was hallucinating from the pain and fatigue.

It's fair to say giving birth to multiples scares the crap out of me. Add to that all the health risks, cesearean birth, premature birth and all the issues surrounding that (my family already has a lot of lung issues so adding premature birth to that is not a good idea), possible miscarriage, etc, etc. I have absolutely no peace when it comes to pursuing fertility drugs to get pregnant.

After our appointment I felt really hopeless about our situation. I called and talked (and cried) to a close friend, and I realized that I don't believe we're going to have another child, and I was sad because I didn't want to see my family disappointed. Hubby and I had a long heart to heart, and we decided that we're not going to pursue fertility drugs at this time.

So, we're going to continue with our cleanse. I'm going to work towards my goal weight of 150 lbs. My husband is going to try some chinese herbs when we're done the cleanse. And we're leaving it in God's hands. If we're meant to have a baby, we will. If not, we won't.

The hardest part of letting this dream die is our son's intense desire for a sibling. Every night he asks us to pray for a brother or sister and I feel like a fraud giving him hope that will happen. Faith? Not much. Last night I explained that sometimes families are done with one child. He rejected that idea completely and declared he is going to continue praying for a sibling. Oh, to have the faith of a small child.

Changes are coming...

I am having a new website built, and the blog format is going to change a lot in the coming days. Stay tuned for a new link and a beautiful new site.

Carob Coconut Candy

Doing a candida diet? Dying for something sweet and chocolatey? Have I got the treat for you! I came across this recipe on a parenting board I frequent ages ago, and then never got around to trying it. Saw it again today and decided to substitute the cocoa powder with carob and see how it would turn out. Oh. Yum. Without further ado...

Ingredients:

1/4 cup organic raw coconut oil
1 heaping t toasted carob
1 t xylitol or agave nectar
unsweetened shredded coconut

Instructions:

Mix coconut oil and carob till smooth and creamy. Add sweetener. Add enough shredded coconut to absorb all the carob mixture. I think I used about 1/4 cup, maybe less.

Stick in freezer on small dessert plate for about 10 minutes to allow it to set. Cut, hide from family members so you don't have to share, and eat slowly with eyes closed.

Added benefit: Both coconut oil and xylitol are very good at killing yeastie beasties.

Eating organic on a budget

Some tips for eating a vegetarian organic whole food diet on a budget:

1. Buy in bulk. We purchased a 25 lb bag of rice and a 25 lb bag of kamut grain and split them with a family member.
2. Find a local farm that sells directly to the customer. We have an organic farm right around the corner from us that sells the most amazing produce from about April till the end of November.
3. Learn how to preserve foods. Stock up on in-season food and can/freeze/dehydrate for the winter months.
4. Meal plan! This one should be #1 on the list cause it's SO crucial to keep food costs down. When I'm not organized I end up doing half a dozen "quick trips" to the grocery store and it can literally double our grocery bill for the week.
5. Get used to eating leftovers. Make enough to last a few meals, pre-cook on the weekend, and eat leftovers all week.
6. Stop eating meat and dairy. Stock up on beans and lentils to get your daily protein.
7. Don't buy pre-made packaged foods. The more you cook from scratch, the more you'll save.
8. Invest in a food processor, a good blender, and a bread machine. Make sauces, dressings, baked goods, and bread from scratch.
9. Share appliances/kitchen tools with friends and family members. Say you have a cherry pitter and an apple slicer and your friend has a flour mill, offer to do a lending swap.

Taking inventory of my medical history

So here's what I listed on my original interview with my Homeopath Doctor. I hope that by sharing this, others will be able to relate and find hope in their situation. I feel pretty vulnerable putting it "out there", but the purpose of this blog is to share my experience so others can find answers to their own issues.

Past Medical History (include dates)

• Surgeries – growth under eye removed age 7, mole and birthmark removals (bleeding and flaky, benign) by cosmetic surgeon age 22, hemorrhoid removal age 29 (I think?)

Significant Trauma (auto accidents, falls, etc.)

• In my early teens I was tripped by someone when I was running, and hit head first on a cement floor and had a huge goose egg. I still have a bump of scar tissue on my head from that incident. When I was 5 years old I jumped off a seesaw swing set and ripped my leg open on a bolt. It required 60 stitches (without anesthetic) that left a large triangle shaped scar on my leg. I was also in an emotionally and physically abusive relationship for 6 years that caused significant emotional trauma. I did somatic experiencing therapy to help heal the trauma in my life and have had a lot of peace since.

Birth History (prolonged labour, forceps delivery, etc.)

• Don't know my own birth history, other than being born in a hospital and was born at around 44 weeks. I had a natural home birth with my son, over 100 hours of labor, under a considerable amount of personal stress throughout pregnancy and labour due to abandonment by my ex husband when I was 3 months into my pregnancy.

Medicines taken within the last two months (include vitamins, over-the-counter drugs, herbs, etc.)

• daily multi-vitamin, vitex, maca root, metformin (stopped taking cause it causes so much stomach pain and bloating and weight gain), Kyolic immune boosting garlic formula. Immune boosting homemade herbal tonic from herbalist.

Occupational Stresses (chemical, physical, psychological, etc.)

• on the computer for long hours everyday, carpal tunnel syndrome and tendonitis in both arms and wrists

Normal exercise routine

• not much. Have attempted a few different exercise regimes, including just basic walking, but end up quitting due to an inflamed SI joint in my left hip and lower back pain

Allergies and Sensitivities: (food, chemical, environmental, inhalant, drug, etc)

• Food: carrots (hives), soy (bloating and stomach cramps), hazelnuts (throat started itching and got swollen immediately)
• Environmental: pollen and grass, dustmites, poplar trees, severe hayfever every year, especially for the first couple years when I move somewhere new. Had no hayfever symptoms while pregnant and nursing. Within 2 weeks of my son weaning it came back full force.
• Drugs: tetracyclin
  

Any history of anaphylactic shock? Yes, to dairy in my teens. No longer have issues.

Habits: how many, how often

• Coffee – 1 mug a week
• Tea - 2 or 3 mugs per day
• Cola - 2 or 3 cans per day
• Alcohol – socially in small amounts
• Sugar – 2-6 T in tea, cola, a dessert daily
  

Family Medical History: who

• Cancer – mother non-hodgkins lymphoma and died at age 47
• High Blood Pressure – maternal grandma
• Stroke – maternal grandpa (age 85)
• Asthma – both parents
• Allergies – both parents
• Alcoholism – father (sober/dry for over 30 years now)
• Arthritis – maternal grandma
  

Appetite & Thirst

• Poor appetite - in the mornings
• Excessive appetite – sometimes depending on hormone fluctuations
• Change in appetite – sometimes depending on hormone fluctuations
• Bloating – hormone related
• Gas (flatulence/burping) – frequent but no scent
• Cravings – sugary sweet foods, coca-cola, “junk” food when stressed
• Peculiar tastes/smells – hyper sensitive to smells
• Reflux/Hiatial hernia – sometimes, not as often as during my teens
• Body weight changes – gain weight when under stress or trying a new medication
• Strong thirst (cold/hot drinks) – yes, always
  

Energy

• Fatigue – tend to be anemic and get very fatigued in the fall; extremely tired in the mornings

Sleep

• Insomnia- frequently, since teens
• Difficult to get asleep – frequently, since teens
• Wakes easily - yes
• Wakes tired – almost always, since teens
• Excessive dreaming – almost always dream, very vivid and detailed, all my life
  

Immune Function:

• Number of colds/flu per year: 3-6
• Recurrent sore throats – frequently, 2 or 3 times a year, had bad case of strept when 10 years old and colds seem to turn to strept often
• Swollen glands – when I have a cold
• Fevers – maybe once a year with the flu
• Chills – a couple times a year with cold/flu
• Inability for skin to heal – large pimples on insides of thighs or face take weeks, sometimes months to heal
• Susceptibility to illness – catch colds easily and end up with a lingering cough for a long time afterward
  

Skin and Hair:

• Dry skin – in the winter
• Oily skin - usually
• Pimples – face, neck, insides of thighs, difficult clearing up, had a large one in armpit that kept recurring for months
• Hives – on occasion on my chest and shoulders, with no idea what causes it
• Itching – sweaty areas under breasts, top of thighs, chest and shoulders
• Other hair or skin problems – extremely oily hair and have to wash every day
  

Head, Eyes, Ears, Nose and Throat:

• Dizziness - occasionally
• Headaches (where and when) – weather related, hayfever related, stress related, tension headaches occasionally, have migraines a couple times a year
• Migraines – a couple times a year
• Other head or neck problems – wake up with a stiff neck sometimes
• Glasses/contacts – yes, strong prescription
• Color/night blindness – hard to see when driving at night
• Dry/itchy eyes – related to hayfever
• Spots in eyes (floaters) – constant floater in left eye, others come and go
• Sinus problems – susceptible to sinus infections and always have a runny nose
• Mucus - constantly
• Canker sores - a couple times a year
• Jaw clicks - yes
• Grinding teeth – when sleeping, yes
• Dry mouth – only when taking antihistamines
  

Cardiovascular:

• Numbness/pins and needles – in my arms from carpal tunnel syndrome
• Dizziness - occasionally
• Fainting – twice, both times related to ovarian cysts bursting (age 19/20)
• Swelling in hands/feet – weather, hormonal and hydration related
• Tremors – from caffeine
• Body weight changes – during stress have gained large amounts of weight; metformin for PCOS caused more weight gain
• Other: - phantom bug-crawling feeling on feet and toes, never anything there
  

Respiratory and Cardiac:

• Cough – lingers when I get a cold
• Difficulty in breathing when lying down – when I have a cold
• Shortness of breath – when I have a cold
• Pains in chest – recently had a painful episode that lasted a couple days, went to emerg, they couldn't find anything
  

Gastrointestinal:

• Nausea - related to car movement lately, never used to have issues
• Heartburn - occasionally
• Gas (flatulence) – often and loud, but not smelly
• Constipation - yes
• Pain or cramps - frequently
• Belching - frequently
• Diarrhea - occasionally
• Hemorrhoids (internal/external) – external. Had one removed, but is back a little
• Sensitive abdomen – yes, often have pains, can't handle restrictive clothes
• Frequency (eg. 1x /day) – 1-2 times per day alternating with every other day
• Color (dark, light, green, black etc) – light brown
• Odor (normal or extreme) - normal
• Texture (formed or loose) - both
• Urgency/Difficult to expel - both
  

Musculoskeletal:

• Neck pain – wake up with stiff neck that lasts a few days
• Facial pain – jaw pain from TMJ
• Muscle pains – muscle cramps that feel like a charley horse in my chest/abdomen area when I bend over, severely painful and takes my breath away
• Back pain (location) – lower back seizes up after sex or getting a massage. Have to pull legs into chest and roll on spine before standing up or I can't lift my leg and moving is very painful
• Joint pain (location) – SI joint in left hip is often inflamed, movement is limited
• Other joint or bone problems – feet and ankles hurt a lot, chiropractor says it's a fallen arch

Genito-Urinary:

• Wake up to urinate – how often per night, what times – rarely
• Frequent day urination - yes
• Urgency to urinate - yes
• History of yeast infection – had first one last year
• History of bladder infections – had a couple in my early 20's
• Sexual dysfunction – low libido
• Fertility problems – PCOS, very irregular menses
  

Pregnancy and Gynecology

• Age at first menses - 13
• Flow (heavy/light) heavy
• Vaginal discharge (color) - varies from clear to cloudy white
• Period - frequency, duration: 2 or 3 a year, duration is about a week
• Clots – yes when it's ending
• Yeast infections – had first one treated last year
• Last PAP – a few years ago
• Birth control type and duration – no
• Changes in body/psyche prior to menstruation (PMS) – moody, cramps, bloating
• Number pregnancies – 1
• Number births –1
• Irregular periods – yes
• Last mense date March 5, 2009
• Fertility problems: PCOS dx'd last year, but have had issues since my teens. I had a cyst burst on two different occasions in my teens, but was not treated or dx'd with PCOS. Have been seeing a fertility specialist for over a year. Put me on metformin to regular my period but it didn't help and it just made my stomach really hurt. Wants me to lose weight, but I find it's next to impossible with all the sugar cravings
  

We started the cleanse one month ago today

Back in May of this year I was 280 lbs. I had my husband take these pics of me in all my glory.

There were taken this morning at 268 lbs. Twelve pounds doesn't make much difference at my size, but I can see a little less back fat and my face seems a tad slimmer to me. What do you think?

I am no longer suffering from insomnia, and I sleep all night without pain. I have been having weird nightmares every night though. Not sure what's up with that.

I've lost 10 lbs. My clothes are looser. I feel smaller and lighter. I'm shocked when I look at pics cause I feel SO much smaller than I look.

I poop like clockwork. Within an hour of waking I have a good healthy BM. Still a bit loose and seaweed green, but at least it's regular.

I've finished 3 of the 8 days of tissue flushing by drinking 10-12 cups of room temp water. My eyeballs feel like their floating, but I've lost over half a pound each day since I started the flushing.

The worst of the detox seems to be behind me. My energy levels are great and I'm getting a lot done in my days. The extreme fatigue that has plagued me for years has lifted, hallelujah!

My stomach is no longer bloated, and my farts are "normal" (as in, stinky).

I'm getting into regular exercise again. I do pilates twice a week, and I don't feel like dying when I go for a short walk. There's still a lot of improvement to be made in this area, but I see progress.

No cravings. None. Not a single one. I have a smidgeon of resentment because I'm not "allowed" to have something that looks or sounds yummy but is on my "avoid" list, but only occasionally. Interestingly, the resentment seems worst after watching TV for a couple hours. Darn commercials. I am going to make a point of getting up and doing something during the commercials instead of watching them.

Less sinus drainage. I was perplexed by the dry throat at night, but then it dawned on me that it has literally been YEARS since I didn't have mucus running down the back of my throat. No wonder it felt dry.

Breakfast. I eat it now. 'nuff said.

Spicy Vegetarian Bean Chili Recipe

I love spicy food! I thought I'd share how I make my chili cause it's so amazing, and I'd love to hear what your veggie chili looks like.

Organic Ingredients:

10 mushrooms, sliced
1 sweet onion, diced
3 cloves garlic, crushed
1 green bell pepper, diced
2 T coconut oil
1 small can green chilies, diced
2 large cans diced tomatoes
2 jars roasted pepper marinara sauce
1 package spicy chili seasoning (red chilis, garlic, salt, cumin, cayenne pepper, coriander, black pepper, oregano, allspice, cloves)
2 regular size cans pinto beans, rinsed

Instructions:

1. Saute onion, garlic, and mushrooms in coconut oil. Add green chilies, bell pepper, and seasonings. Simmer till all veggies are cooked al dente.
2. Add remaining ingredients. Bring to a boil. Simmer on low for an hour (or till dinner time).

Serve with homemade soda bread or tortilla chips.

The ol' hormones are surging... (long update)

Sunday through Tuesday I was in a real grumpy mood, hyper sensitive about everything, and I'm pretty sure it was PMS. I keep hoping my period will start on its own, but so far no show. I did a pregnancy test a couple days ago and it was negative. Gah. I hate my non functioning hormones sometimes.

Next Monday we have an appointment with a fertility specialist, and we have decided I won't be taking any fertility meds or doing in-vitro. That feeling was solidified by a show we saw last night on TLC where three families ended up with high order multiples due to fertility treatments. My heart was breaking for one mom who was pregnant with quads and one of her babies died. Another family gave birth to six babies, and they were in NICU for months! I can't imagine the strain that would put on a family. Not to mention having 4-6 newborns, 4-6 toddlers, 4-6 pre-teens, 4-6 teens... Yikes! Watching the Gosselin family self-destruct in the public eye has been heart-rending as well. I just don't want that for my family.

Anyways, here's a report of how things are going with the healing cleanse:

Yesterday we hosted a birthday party for our 6 year old son, and I had a friend make icing for my sugar free on-program cupcakes so our guests could have icing if they wanted. I was surprised that some opted out! The cupcakes were a huge success. We made bavarian smokies on the BBQ and had plain kettle potato chips and lemon-lime spritzers. We couldn't eat the buns or condiments (or the wine the adults were sipping), but everything else was on program. I am vegetarian, so I had some leftover brown rice and roast veggies. I felt like I overate on the potato chips, but this morning I was down another 0.7 lbs, so I guess all the running around I did preparing and running the party burned it all off.

Speaking of weight loss, I hit a new milestone! I'm in the 260's now. Goodbye 280 forever. Goodbye 270's forever. I've been losing a lot of inches around my chest and back, and my shirts are fitting better already. That's a nice feeling.

Today I woke up at 8:30 AM feeling really energetic. I've cleaned my kitchen, organized my son's toy drawers, had a shower, cooked a hot breakfast, and tidied my office. And it's not even noon yet. This afternoon I am going to clean up the carport (site of my son's birthday party), go to the farm and get some veggies for a chili and spaghetti sauce this week and cook a couple warming fall meals for the week. I'll also put in a couple hours in the office cause I'm wrapping up a big project for a client this week.

In the bowel movement front, things are still very green and loose. Not sure when that will improve, but any time would be just fine by me. The good news is that I'm regular like clockwork now. I can count on having a good BM within an hour of waking every morning.

I haven't been able to get the water in yet, but I bought a jug to keep it in, and I started seriously today. So far I'm 1/5 done for the day. I'm determined to get through it all for the next 8 days and see what happens.

We decided it's time to get more movement in our life, so every Monday we are doing a pilates class with a teacher who is helping us with our form, and during the week we do a Winsor Pilates DVD that I really like. I've noticed it's really making a difference with my energy levels and the way I sleep at night. My back isn't constantly hurting all the time, and I can feel my posture improving everyday.

Carob Pumpkin Kamut Cupcakes

It's my son's birthday tomorrow and we aren't eating sugar, and he's allergic to eggs and dairy, so I used a the Chocolate Fudge Cake recipe out of The Cake Bible by Rose Levy Beranbaum and made some pretty major changes to fit our needs. This cake is sugar-free, dairy-free, caffeine-free, egg-free, and wheat-free. It has a moist brownie texture, and I made 2 dozen cupcakes and 1 dozen mini cupcakes from the following recipe.

Wet ingredients:
0.75 cup and 3 T roasted carob powder
1.5 cup boiling water
2 cups raw dark organic agave nectar
1.5 teaspoons vanilla extract (I recommend real & organic)
1 large can pumpkin puree

Dry Ingredients:
3 cups kamut flour
2.25 t baking powder
1 t baking soda
1 t salt

Instructions:
1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.
2. Prepare 2 cupcake pans with cupcake liners
3. In a medium size bowl whisk together the carob and boiling water until smooth.
4. Add vanilla and agave nectar to the carob mixture. Set aside.
5. In a large bowl mix dry ingredients.
6. Add carob mixture to dry ingredients and stir till smooth.
7. Add pumpkin puree and stir till smooth.
8. Fill cupcake trays and bake for 10 minutes, turn trays, bake another 10 minutes. Test with a knife and when it comes out clean they are done baking. If it needs extra time, check every couple of minutes so they aren't over cooked.

Serve and enjoy! We are putting birthday sparklers on ours. I will add pics after the party.

Progress tickers in the sidebar

If you read my blogs on google reader or some other blog reader, you probably didn't notice I've added a couple tickers.

The first one is my weight loss ticker, and will be changing as my weight goes down (and hopefully not up!). I've lost 7 lbs since we started, and tomorrow will be my "official" weigh in for the week as we started on a Tuesday.

The second one is my countdown to the end of this 8 month cleanse. I can't believe we are almost finished our first month!!! Tomorrow will be 4 full weeks since we started. It's actually going by quite quickly.

Eating in is a real pleasure...

Tonight I made fresh spinach sautee'd in toasted sesame oil, garlic and ginger on brown rice with a little wheat free tamari. On the side we had leftover veggies roasted (more like caramelized) in homemade pesto. It has been raining and chilly all day so we have a fire in the wood burning stove and we sipped hot decaf chai tea with our dinner.

The Yeastie Beastie is dying!

The other day it was really hot and humid, and usually I smell like freshly baked bread (yeastie, in other words) when I get sweaty. I was really excited to find I didn't smell like anything! Woohoo. It's working... :) I also find I'm not as itchy in my nether-regions. Very exciting!

Eating in Restaurants with a Restrictive Diet...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.... Ha. Ha. ha.

Oh my word. So my SIL and nephew are in town, and they wanted to get together for dinner tonight. B and I decided that sushi was probably our best bet, because you know, it's seaweed, rice and veggies, right? So we took them to a Japanese restaurant that we had never been to before, but had great reviews online.

Looking at the menu was a real chore. The vegetarian selection was 99% tofu content, and I can't eat soy, so I took the 1% (spring rolls) and ordered cucumber avocado sushi rolls.

With some Japanese tea.

My first mistake! I took 4 sips and realized - caffeine! I quickly had her switch it to some iced decaf barley tea...

The spring rolls came with a very runny dipping sauce, I smelled it and it smelled like soya sauce. I dipped one corner into it and it was VERY sweet. I knew it was a no-go immediately, and pushed it aside.

Next came my sushi. I was starving at this point, and the portions weren't particularly generous. I looked at the soya sauce ingredients... wheat and soy. I decided to chance it since how much wheat could there be in it?

Oh boy. Bad idea. On the walk back to the ferry my stomach started cramping so badly that by the time we got to our bench I was doubled over in pain. Yikes!!!

I'm home now, and my stomach is hugely bloated and painful. So not worth it. I would have enjoyed my roast veggies and brown rice SO much better. :(

I won't be eating out again anytime soon.

Random Thoughts

I just don't want to drink plain water. This is the first real resistance I've felt against this program (well, other than the initial sugar/caffeine withdrawal). I love COLD water, but room temperature water is just ick. I need that throat bite, you know, as it goes down.

Heather is bringing me some mint she harvested fresh yesterday, so that will definitely be going into the water.

On Monday the plumber is coming to change the water filter on our well, so that might help too. The water is very sulphury right now, so we let it sit for a couple hours to let all the sulphur evaporate off. Oh, the joy of country living.

Last night I was feeling pretty awful. Woozy. Exhausted. Headachey. I'm guessing it was more detox happening. I went to bed at 6:30 PM. My 6 yo wasn't even bed yet. I didn't even hear my husband come to bed at 11 PM, I was so deeply asleep.

When I feel bad, I sleep it off. The next day I'm usually fine, but sleep is the one and only thing that my body wants when I'm not well, and I'm learning to listen to my body. If my body says I'm tired, I go to sleep. If my body says I'm hungry, I eat. If my body says I'm bored, I get cable TV hooked up and watch mindless drivel until the wee hours of the morning. Ha ha. I'm TOTALLY kidding. No. Really.

Of course, by 4:30 this morning I was wide awake, so I had 3 hours of quiet alone time before the rest of the house awoke. There's a real nip in the air in the mornings lately, and fall is just around the corner. There was a cold drizzle and I was shivery, so I put fuzzy warm socks on, made a mug of hot decaf earl grey tea with a spoon of agave nectar, turned the heat on in my office, shut the door, and read and posted on my favorite parenting forum for three solid hours. Pure unadulterated bliss.

I was down another pound this morning. I'll officially update my weight loss ticker on Tuesday. I've lost 3 inches around my chest/back, 2 inches off my waist, and my jeans are getting loose. Today I'm comfortably wearing the pair that was too tight to sit down in. Thought you should know. :)

This water task is whippin' my butt

Yesterday I got in 9 of the 10-12 waters I was supposed to drink.

Today I got in 5. Yeah, I know, I know... DRINK MORE! But I had "one of those days" and it just didn't happen.

Did you know it's a full moon tomorrow night?

The day started with my lovely step mom dropping off a box of free apples from her trees for me to make apple sauce. After taking my son to his swim lesson, I spent close to an hour (or more) peeling and slicing them, boiled them down, added a little cinnamon, and put it on low to simmer until a few stubborn pieces softened.

My husband was outside doing volcano plaster molds for our son's birthday party this weekend, and a hair client arrived, so I ran outside to clean plaster out of a bowl for him before it hardened.

While I'm doing that, my client arrived to drop off a cheque. I realized I need to go pick up 1500 brochures I had printed for her, so I leave the (now hardened) plaster soaking in cold water, and run inside to get my purse. I see my applesauce is still on, so I flick it off as I'm running out the door.

I get back home about 15 minutes later, and as I am getting out of the car, I hear our smoke alarm going off. I *know* I turned the burner off, but when I get indoors my dear husband has just finished fanning the alarm and taken my now VERY burnt applesauce off the stove. That flick of the wrist to turn it off? I turned it on high instead off. GAH!

I run back out cause I now have 1500 brochures that I have triple fold by hand, and this requires a couple movies. They tell me the movie I returned weeks ago was never returned, and I really need to bring it back. I DID!!!! Gah!

I go back home and there's an email from my accountant saying that the amendments she made to our tax return were done, but when she reopened it to print it, the changes were gone! Please call ASAP. *sigh* We get that worked out... I scrub at the burnt pot (it's hopeless)...

Now you tell me... where in all of this do you see an opportunity to drink 10-12 cups of water?!! Cause I certainly didn't find one. I'm lucky I got 5 cups in!

So on that note, I'm going to bed. And no, I'm not drinking 5 cups before bed cause I want to sleep, not float.

Evidence of Changes

This morning I put on a pair of jean capris (read, NOT stretchy) that I used to have to suck in my gut as much as I could, hold my breath, and STILL pinched my skin trying to get the button and zipper done up. This morning? I did them up with ease AND there's about a half inch looseness in the waistband now.

Another evidence of change is my increased energy levels. I woke up at 7:15 AM without an alarm, ready to go. Got up, did my Winsor Pilates DVD with my family, and cooked and ate an egg and toast (well, ryvita crackers in my case) breakfast with my hubby. I was in the shower and out the door for my son's swim lesson this morning by 9:30 AM. We went to the library, the drugstore, the grocery store and the hardware store, and got home before 11:30 AM.

Another thing I've noticed is I am REALLY enjoying eating the food we are preparing. It's wholesome, organic, and made from scratch, and most importantly super healthy! Which reminds me, I forgot to stop at the organic farm, so I need to pop back out and get some more veggies... Be back later!

Why is it easy this time?

People are amazed and inspired by me (a first!) because I'm able to stick to this crazily restrictive diet without feeling deprived or depressed.

Some things that have helped make me successful:

1. The timing is right. I'm physically and mentally ready to make some major changes in my life.
2. I work from home so I have the time to prepare healthy meals from scratch. I spend one full day a week preparing food so we always having something ready to eat in the fridge.
3. My whole family is doing this and supporting me. We don't have off-limit foods in the house. Everything has been cleared out and good foods brought in. (It helps that it's such a long time... we can't use the excuse that we'll eat it after we're done.)
4. We have the money to buy supplements and specialty "treats" to help make us successful.
5. My biological baby clock is no longer ticking, it's roaring, so I'm feeling highly motivated to get healthy so I can get pregnant.
6. I'm actually wanting to lose weight, and willing to diet for more than a week this time around. First time in probably 10 years (maybe more).

Drink more water...

So I emailed Dr. D. again cause I was suprised she was saying I could have lemon in my water as citrus is one of the foods I'm supposed to avoid... as I expected, lemon is not okay. Bah. Getting my hopes up and all!

No, sorry – citrus is ok later – you’ll have to hold off for a bit longer. I think we spoke about 8 months total for it – I know it is long, but hang in there as it is really worth it. Your body does not utilize citrus well and you are sensitive to it – it affects skin and water retention when a patient is sensitive. There is nothing else to add back in, and certainly if things change we can, but at the moment you are looking at about 8 months total to get your body working properly, then some time after that for it to fully recover. Hang in there.

Another question I had was about the muscle fatigue I've been having after doing Pilates. B and I have to rest for 2-3 days between workouts cause we're so sore and achy... Dr. D said,

Pilates is very hard – My muscles burn too, and am sore and achey after. The solution is more water to flush out the lactic acid that accumulates from it, and to keep at it. Usually, after 3-4 weeks it improves a lot.

I asked about the herbal tea I made, cause I wanted to make sure it was "on program". Nope... not a go! I do have a pot of dried up mint in my garden, so I am going to go "harvest" dead mint tomorrow... Doesn't that sound appetizing?!! Dr. D says,

The herbal red raspberry leaf and mint tea are not the same, as they are a herbal mix and not just water. Mint in fresh water is just slightly flavored water – try it.

I was also moaning about the slow weight loss (as usual) and Dr. D had some true and valid comments (although I already knew this, but was looking for a quick, or at least quicker, fix).

So far, with weight loss, you are averaging 2 lbs a week, which is safe and fine. More quickly would not be as effective as your system needs to adjust so that you don’t yoyo back. I think you will find it will speed up when you are finished the grapefruit seed extract – look at the next 2 and a bit months as an adjustment period, and then more results will come about. Hang in there!

Thanks, Dr. D. You're the best. :)

Healing with Water

I emailed Dr. D about the carbonation (see prior post) and here is her reply:

Club soda is ok. Your body needs to recover internally a bit before you'll have much weight loss. One way to speed it up is to drink lots of water- like 10-12 cups daily. Put some fresh lemon in it if you want flavor, or some crushed mint leaves, buts that's it. Your system will feel waterlogged or bloated as the fluids flush out the tissues, but then you will feel more energy and faster weight loss. Boiled water, like in herbal tea, and adding juice etc are not the same as water. About 8 days to fully hydrate your tissues, and then you'll notice the water retention going and weight too. Otherwise, hang in there. We need to treat you from the inside out.

Nobody has explained the whole water thing to me before. This is so fascinating!

Incidentally, last night I made a jug of red raspberry leaf/mint tea, and put it in the fridge. Today I left it out on the counter and sipped it room temperature. I only managed to get 4 glasses down, but I think they are more like 1.5 cups each, so that's a good start. Tomorrow I will start drinking it earlier in the day and try to get 1 cup in every hour. It's actually quite refreshing, and double bonus is the red raspberry leaf is awesome for my uterus.

Stinky Toots

I know you all wanted to hear about my flatulence, but in the interest of full disclosure, I think it's only fair to say that my bloated-tummy extra-loud stink-free farts are a thing of the past. Hellooooooo stinky farts. (sorry, B). And that, my friend, is what a healthy dose of fibre will do for you. ;)

No digestive enzymes could be linked to carbonated water

Today I was posting on a mothering forum about my frustration with my slow weight loss. We were discussing juice and whether or not that could be a culprit, and I mentioned that my "treat" is a club soda with a little unsweetened cranberry juice.

I was sent this link on carbonation.

It really makes sense... I drink a lot of carbonated drinks, and have since I was a young teen.

One of my issues is that I don't have digestive enzymes.

In the simplest terms, the bubbles in soda and carbonated water destroy the nutrients and digestive enzymes in the foods you eat by causing a disturbance in pH levels in the digestive tract. Even supplementing the diet with the enzymes needed to properly digest and assimilate food cannot counteract the effects of carbonation. (Source in link above)

One more thing to eliminate... *sigh*

White Trash

This is a true story. I couldn't make it up if I tried.

So yesterday my son and I were on Vancouver Island doing some errands, which we had not planned for. We were just going to walk over on the ferry, do a quick errand and go home, but when we went to park, we noticed the line was unusually short, so last minute decision, we got in line with the car and made it a day.

Well, we didn't have extra food with us. And due to our severely restricted diet on this healing cleanse, about 2 hours into the trip we were both starving. The only thing I could think of that was fast food and "safe" was fries. Now, neither of us actually like fries, ironically, but we were so hungry we both decided to get one anyways. The mall we were at had a McDonald's so we went through the drive through.

Problem being... our next stop was the health food store.

Pride got in the way, and I just couldn't go in to buy organic whole foods accompanied by a small child with a box of fries in his hand. I told him he needed to finish the fries in the car.

We're sitting there listening to Jack Johnson on the stereo, chowing on fries in our red McDonald's containers, and I see this hippie couple walk by our car and greet another couple of hippie women.

You might think I'm passing judgement here, but they were SO stereotypical. Seriously. The two women each had a child with them, and the little boy (maybe around 2 years old?) had only a shirt on. Yes, everything the Lord gave him was hanging out for public viewing.

So they are standing RIGHT next to my car, it's a warm day, my window is down, and I hear this:

Hippie woman: There's nothing like a screaming kid in walmart to make you feel like white trash.
Hippie man: Oh, were you by the McDonalds?

I think I might have choked a little on my fry.

The Bedtime Throat

Sounds sexy, right?

It's not.

I feel relatively well all day (except for the bloats and indigestion still), and then 10 PM rolls around and my throat and glands start hurting. Weirdest thing.

Tonight and last night I drank medicinal throat coat tea before, which doesn't help at all, but makes me feel like I'm doing something...

I have to admit I'm feeling really discouraged by the slow weight loss. *sigh* I haven't cheated ONE time in the last 17 days. Tuesday will be 3 weeks since we started this healing cleanse. I'm down 5 stinkin' pounds. I should be down at least 20 pounds by now, gosh darn it. I've EARNED it. *pouts*

PCOS is a really evil condition. You can't ovulate because you're overweight, but you can't lose weight cause you have PCOS. Evil, I say. Evil!!!!!!!!!!

Getting sick... Inches lost... Exercise started...

I've been fighting a sore throat for the past week or so. I've been in total denial. Maybe if I ignore it, it doesn't exist. Tonight I have a terrible headache, I'm exhausted, and my throat is REALLY sore. *sigh*

Time to pull out the garlic ammo.

In other news, I lost 2 inches from my chest, 1 inch from my waist, and 1 inch from my thighs since starting this cleanse just over 2 weeks ago.

Yesterday I pulled out my favorite 20 minute Winsor Pilates workout video and the whole family gave it a whirl.

Ouch.

Gonna try it again tomorrow if I'm feeling any better and see how that feels. DH and I were going to do a weekly class with a local woman to make sure our form is good, but we need 3 people to start a class, and the one person I was counting on to make our third isn't available now. Guess we'll just stick with the video. It's a good one...

Raw mouth and pimples

How's that for an appetizing title. LOL

Everything I eat today is making my mouth raw. I had a plum... and the back of my throat felt raw.

Just ate some of my roast veggie and the roof of my mouth and lips feel raw now.

Weird.

I've also been getting a new crop of pimples. Just great. *sigh*

On a more positive note, everyone keeps commenting on the beautiful tone to my skin. I don't see it, but thanks. :) I think it's likely the new face toner I've been using in the mornings. Every time I use it people comment on my skin. Or it could be the cleanse. I will never know for sure.

I think I ovulated!

Night before last I got a pang in my right ovary. I recognized it right away cause I used to get that pang every month when I was a teen and into my early 20's. When I stopped taking The Pill when I was 26 years old, I noticed I never got the ovulation pang anymore.

Then I was dx'd with PCOS and it was confirmed that I don't ovulate anymore.

Here's hoping for a new baby G in the spring of 2010.

In other (but similar) news, my dh is adopting my son to make us an official forever family. Yesterday we got the final documents we needed, and on Friday we will be filing the application. We're told it takes 2-4 weeks to finalize a stepparent adoption. I can't express in mere words the joy and excitement this brings to us, knowing we're going to be a forever family now.

I've observed that often when a infertile family adopts they end up getting pregnant soon thereafter. I know this isn't a typical adoption, but hey... we'll take the pregnancy too!

Must. Pack. Food.

Oh dear... I went to "town" today which involves a 1 hour wait in line, 20 minute ferry ride, 50 gazillion errands, another 1 hour wait, and final 20 minute ferry ride. We were running around getting stuff done on the island, so I just dropped my boys off on my way to the ferry and neglected to pack a lunch. Or pack a book to read. Yikes! I grabbed a water and a bag of lays plain potato chips (3 ingredients, all on program) from the Pub while waiting for the ferry, but decided to wait and buy something real to eat at the health food store instead of eating fries.

At the HFS I couldn't find anything appealing that was on program, so I settled for a bag of Kettle potato chips (again, 3 ingredients, all on program) and an organic nectarine. And another water.

I'm an easy going person. Really. But like my stepmom keeps quoting from the book Skinny Bitches, "anger and rage", "anger and rage" when I'm hungry. LOL

By the time I got to the ferry line, it was lined up down the street, and this little old lady jumped the line instead of going around the block to get into the line properly. It wasn't my best moment, I'll admit that right here and now. I honked. I might have yelled a little and gestured that she should have gone around the block. She rolled down her window and yelled back in a very strong European accent "it was inconvenient, so I just turn here". Well, 20 minutes later she's still sitting in the middle of traffic holding everyone up, and I was hungry and mad, so I wouldn't let her in. I should have just let her in. But that's what extreme hunger and exhaustion does to a person, I guess.

Moral of the story? Pack a lunch if you're not going to be around a place that sells real whole food (as opposed to the crap they call food in the fast food drive through). :/

The cool part of this is that I was actually CRAVING veggies. *jaw drops in shock* I came home and sauteed some beet greens in garlic and ginger, and WOWZO it was amazing. Now I'm going to have a bowl of cold leftover roasted veggies from the other night. Who knew in just 2 short weeks I would be craving veggies instead of coca cola! I'm impressed. I'm very impressed.

Food Prep # 2: Spinach and Sundried Tomato Pasta Salad

I have been really enjoying experimenting with recipes. One of my favorite recipes is the Arti-Tom Feta Salad but now that I'm dairy and vinegar free, I had to revise it.

Ingredients:

1/2 cup homemade basil pesto
1 small jar sundried tomatoes packed in oil and drained with a fork (about 1/2 cup)
1 small sweet or red onion diced
1 small jar or can of artichoke hearts
3-4 cups fresh clean baby spinach
1 box of brown rice rotini pasta

Instructions:

So... I set aside some of that amazing basil pesto I made earlier in the day to use in this recipe. Basically it's a LOT of basil, a whole garlic (about 9 or 10 cloves, I think), raw sunflower seeds, and enough olive oil to get the right consistency. If that's too vague for you, feel free to google a good pesto recipe online. I didn't measure anything, just eyed it all... It's pretty difficult to ruin pesto, in my opinion.

Cooked up a box of brown rice rotini pasta. Rinsed in cold water and made sure it was really dry.

Diced a sweet onion (red onion works great too), and sliced the sun dried tomatoes into strips. I sauteed the onion and sun dried tomatoes in the pesto till the onion was starting to go translucent, then added a jar of drained artichoke hearts.

Next I dumped a whole container of fresh baby spinach in and lightly tossed in the hot pan till it was just starting to wilt.

Everything was added to the cold pasta and tossed lightly. Added freshly ground salt & pepper.

Delish!!!

Food prep is the key to my success : Roast Pesto Veggies

Last week I failed in the food prep department and really struggled all week, so this week I am determined to make it happen by being more prepared. Also, we work hard all week and are extremely busy with our two flourishing home businesses, so I want to have food that's just ready to grab at the end of the day.

I feel like the Proverbs 31 woman who rises early in the morning and goes to market (isn't that how it goes) except in my case I slept till 9:30 and went to the organic farm around the corner.

Came home with veggies for roasting: baby red potatoes, beets with fresh greens still attached (cut the greens off to saute later :yum ), baby eggplant, some weird looking squash, red bell peppers and a sweet onion.

I whipped up a basil pesto (as opposed to the cilantro pesto I bought from the HFS two weeks ago) in my food processor. We're dairy free right now so I used raw organic sunflower seeds in place of parmesan and pinenuts (nut free house cause of my son's allergies) and a whole (about 9-10 cloves) organic garlic. :jawdrop SO GOOD! I had frozen some fresh basil from the farm mentioned above last week in a blueberry container, and it worked like a charm. :rockon Threw that in plus some jarred basil I bought this week.And olive oil of course.

Anywho, tossed all the diced veggies into a big bowl, added pesto, mixed, and then laid out on pans, and roasted for about 1.5 hours till the onions started caramelizing. SOOOOO yummy...

Next thing I made was a pot of brown rice rotini and set it aside for my cold pasta salad...But I'll give that recipe its own post.

Birthing a new me...

I was whining about the length of this healing cleanse diet, and Dr. D pointed out that it's almost the length of a pregnancy, and at the end, I will have given birth to a new me. I love that analogy.

You're gonna need new clothes...

Last night as I was drifting off to sleep I hear,

DH: You better start putting aside money for new clothes

Me: Huh?

DH: For when we finish this cleanse and your clothes are too big

Me: Yeah...

DH: ...for the washing machine...

Me: What?!

DH: ...and clean clothes like me

Me: *laughing out loud and realizing he's talking in his sleep* Yes, dear... Good night, dear...

But he does make a good point. Two weeks ago I started putting $25 a week into a savings account, laughing to myself cause seriously, at this rate, that trip to Hawaii could take YEARS. But... I now have $50 put away... and if I keep it up, in 8 months time I will have $825 saved! That's plenty for my wardrobe and DH's snazzy new wardrobe too.